Monday, September 19, 2011 it just me? I just dont get it.

I have a problem, at least I think its a problem.
We live on the same property as my husbands oldest brother. I have asked him twice to not feed my horses. Again today I seen him walk out and dump corn husks over the fence. He has never had horses or even been around them until he came to live here. My girls are fat and happy, and I do give them corn stalks when we grow them on the place. I do not feed them store bought corn husks, because of all the chemicals and mold. Another time, this Summer,  I found where he had tossed out in the field a bucket of old rotten apples. And a couple days ago I found a pile of moldy corn husks.  Come on already! I have explained to him that I cant afford that vet bill! when they colic over spoiled food??? They didnt eat them, I threw them back over the fence.
So I have asked him twice, how do I impress upon him that I dont want him feeding them garbage? I have told him that they are not cows and cant eat like a cow. I just dont understand. I want to know what they are getting and when, I am really picky about that.
I need ideas, or I am going to go postal on him! I was so upset and shaking when I seen him do that today.  Hubby he just shakes his head. I am going to have to ask him to say something too.

Do I really have to put signs up that say "Dont feed the horses" on property they have been on for 20 years!!!!


  1. Sounds like you have a boundary problem - you set the boundaries and he doesn't pay attention to them . . . don't know how to fix that one.

  2. I say you tell him that he can feed them whatever he like so long as when they get sick he pays for the vet bill. It seems harsh and might make family get togethers awkward, but if you've told him before that you can't afford paying for a bill like that when it was completely preventable like not feeding them trash. At that point it's his responsibility.

  3. Oh, this is a tough one. Does he have a wife or someone else who has more influence on him than you do? Perhaps they could talk to him?

  4. Yikes, that sounds upsetting. I agree with Kate, I don't know what you could do about that, other than getting more aggressive about stating the boundaries.

  5. That's really rude of him not to respect your horse feeding request. Horses aren't garbage disposals. You may have to leave up a sign that says don't feed the horses, plus one that shows an expensive vet bill, and another that shows the consequences of what happens to a horse with colic! Good luck!

  6. Sorry to hear that. I would be unhappy about that also. If talking to him about it hasn't worked then post a sign like you said. Maybe he will get it then. Good luck!

  7. This just makes me very angry.
    My passive agressive side tonight picked all the husks up and wrote on the bag "DO NOT Feed HORSEs" and left it out on the road to the barn, where they can see it from thier deck.
    I will talk to him again, I just dont know why I cant get it through his thick skull. ((sigh))
    I dont get along with his wife, she is scared to death of horses anyway and could care less.

  8. You might be being too 'nice' saying things like you can't afford the vet bill etc. Spell it out for him. Garbage can KILL my horses. DEAD, in a very painful and horrible death. They have a bad digestive system and cannot eat many things. If they live long enough to get to the vet the bill will be $10,000 to $20,000 PER HORSE even if they die.
    Make it very clear.
    My best suggestion. :-(

  9. Yikes! That's why our closest family lives over 250 miles away. I just don't deal well with family drama and stress.
    At least it's a good thing your horses are smart enough to know not to eat that old garbage food.


  10. That would be upsetting to me as well. You have asked him nicely, more than, I say it's time to get serious. If he's too thick, or dumb or just disrespectful of your wishes (and your horses), then by all means my friend...go postal!!! Show him the results of crossing the boundaries of a menopausal woman!!! Just think how it will clear the air and relieve some of your pent-up stress and tensions as well. Go forth my good woman. Go forth!!

  11. I hate it when stubborn people act dense. He may as well stick his fingers in his ears and say, "Nah nah nah nah nah, I can't heeeeeeeear you!"


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